Thursday, June 30, 2005

I ain't from no Mexico, I'm Pretto-Rican!



So what a better way to kick off my blogging experience than to start out with a reference to one of the funniest episodes ever of South Park! If any of you keep up with my Milwaukee Sister's Blog , then you already know I was in Puerto Rico this past week, and let me tell you I very much felt like J-lo with my broken spanish! lol But then again, someone at my hotel told me one night "well, at least you don't say stuff like "el puerta". Apparently when Jennifer was down there for her concert a few years back she made a fool of herself in interviews!

But enough of that hoochie, let's talk about my trip! Ah, it was pure bliss. I was in desperate need of some time alone so I figured San Juan was the perfect destination. Not only could I discover my Puerto Rican roots but I could get a nice tan! Unfortunately, I got burned quite badly. I think my back was as pink as my speedo by the end of the trip! oh no!


I stayed at the Atlantic Beach Hotel. Let's just say it looked so much nicer in the pictures! Luckily I was in the heart of Condado which is the real trendy part of San Juan. In fact, I was right around the corner from the salon where Olga Tañón filmed her most recent video, The Style Lounge. I regret not having gone inside, it looked really cool, not to mention the place was filled with hot guys that looked like Ricky Martin and Charlie Masso, lol.

So I spent most of my time on the beach, shopping in Condado and Old San Juan, or eating some arroz con habichuelas at one of the near by restaurants. Actually, I think I ate too many habichuelas. Every morning I woke up with monster gas and had to take a HUGE dump! Oops, was that too much information?

i did a little clubbing too, oddly enough the clubs there were practically exact replicas of all of the clubs here in Chicago with one difference......HOTTER men! I behaved myself for the most part since I didn't want to end up like that girl in Aruba, however I had the most traumatizing bathroom experience. I am pee shy as it is and while I was at the urinals, some guy who was clearly high on something, grabbed my wee-wee! Then he proceeded to try to dry hump me for about 5 seconds until he pushed me away and said "leave me alone or I'll bite you!". Um, ok. Shouldn't I have been saying that to him. Needless to say I had to wait until I returned to my hotel to use the bathroom.

All in all I had a great time and I look forward to going back there in December!

I leave you all with a picutre I took of San Juan's gay beach. If you look closely you will see my hotel in the middle, it's the dark brown building.

2 Comments:

Blogger bomitoni said...

OH NO! Those have to be the gayest swim trunks I have ever seen in my life! They look like they came out of International Male! I love it! Congrats on getting your blog up and running...I see u were able to include album covers! I will spread the word that ur blog is up and running!

10:58 PM  
Blogger Chicago_Sexbox said...

oh no! lol
they ARE from International Male! Where else is a big homo like me suppose to get swimwear????

11:42 PM  

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