Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Jewel-Osco Self Checkout Lanes

When the Jewel Osco grocery stores introduced the self checkout lanes I was ecstatic. No longer would I have to stand behind stupid old people and/or retards fumbling with their coupons, food stamps, or wallets. You see, I knew all the poor, trashy, stupid and elderly people would be too intimidated by this new lanes while the technologically inclined individuals like myself would immediately embrace them. Well, I unfortunately underestimated the stupid people of the world. Some of them AREN'T initimidated by the talking computers and touch screens in the self check out lanes.

The way these lanes work is that you are supposed to WAIT until the person in front of you is DONE packing their groceries and has left. Many dumb fucks though seem to leave their common sense at home. On too many occaisions the impatient cunty bitch behind me has started scanning her items while my food is still on the conveyor belt. Our stuff gets mixed up, the conveyor belt stops and a clerk must come over and assist. The next time some dumb fuck does that to me I am taking their groceries and putting them in my bag. That will teach them to fucking wait the extra 2 seconds!


Blogger Pinche Guero said...

I hate fucking idiots who don't know how to use the machines. They can be fast and simple if you just READ and LISTEN.

7:58 PM  
Blogger equippedtofascinate said...

I hate people who don't know how to use self checkout, but I'm SO the person who goes up to it before the other person is finished to rush them. In my defense, I only do it when it's someone who has taken forever to figure it out and has pissed me off already.

10:46 PM  
Blogger Donnie said...

LOL..too funny. Self checkout can be a wonderful thing, but you're right - some dumbshits really can fuck it up.

11:21 PM  
Blogger innommable said...

It's so easy to steal at Self Checkout lanes...

12:09 AM  
Blogger buff said...

Self checkouts are really cool. And since most of the technology is IBM based and licensed to the Great Atlantic and Pacific Tea Company, you can usually go from store to store and the setup as well as the quirks are the same.
It's cool to see a hunky dude pack away his cartful of groceries. It takes a system to both handle the scanning, the packing and the payment, but it's worth it. Thanks for sharing, stud.

1:02 PM  
Blogger Rubicund Y. Logorrhea said...

Innommable: I won't visit you in jail.

9:59 AM  

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