The week leading up to Pride and the actual Pride weekend in Chicago have left me tore up! Ouch! I am so sore...and not in the way many of my delightfully perverted readers might be thinking! However, I am short on time and I will dedicate a proper "Gay Pride" post another day. Instead I wanted to quick post about something that happened to me a few weeks ago that I completely forgot to mention. As I always try to keep my blog wholesome and full of stories the entire family can enjoy so I think it is only appropriate that I blog today about how I helped destroy a two year loving and monogamous relationship.
A few weeks ago I ran into an old fuck buddy of mine and we had a little fun at his place because his "roommate" wasn't home. So he gave me his number and I thought nothing of it. Two weeks later I was in the area and I thought "Oh how convenient. I can pick up my laundry, get some milk at Jewel, drop some books off at the library, volunteer at the orphanage....and then have some sex!". Well, I sent this individual a text message (cuz fuck buddies are NOT worth a real phone call!). I got a really odd message back inquiring "who is this?". I was almost a little insulted at that point...I mean had I been that bad in bed???? Before I broke down crying and stumbled into a bar to drink away my sorrow I realized if I can barely keep up with the plethora of men throwing themselves at me on a daily basis, surely this guy is way sluttier. So I figured he must know another person with the same name. As we converesed via the text messaging though something became very strange....the perfect english grammar. You see, my fuck buddy is originally from Colombia and really put a new spin to the phrase "broken english". However I was having a blonde moment (this time it wasn't coke induced at least!) and made nothing of it.....until the last message when it said "I did tell you I have a boyfriend of TWO YEARS RIGHT??????" It was at this point the brunette in me kicked back in and I realized I had been conversing with this guy's boyfriend! Oh no! I guess that's who the "roommate" was. This guy totally got busted for being a cheating bastard all because of me! LOL
Well, I have been called lots of nasty things in my life...."slut", "whore", "ugly", "cunty bitch"...and I guess I can add "homewrecker" to that list now too!