Saturday, July 19, 2008

Samantha Sexbox

"Poor is the man
Whose pleasures depend
On the permission of another"

At the going away party for my Homegirl Wanda a few weeks ago, Wanda and Federiko were discussing the "Sex And The City" movie when Wanda pointed out that if we were the characters in real life I would be Samantha. If you saw my post a few weeks ago I am not familiar with the show nor the characters so I wasn't sure if that was a compliment or an insult. Nevertheless, my curiosity got the best of me and I did a little investigation as to what this Samantha character was all about. Well, after the initial fury of being compared to the OLDEST cast member subsided, I was laughing all day as to just how accurate Wanda's comparison was. While I wouldn't consider myself a "Trysexual" since I definitely DON'T try just anything just once (fisting will always be out of the question), I am pretty close. My former Brazilian lover from 2007, Xica once told me he loved the fact that outside of the bedroom I was this serious nerd but as soon as the door shut I turned into this Super Slut Sex Maniac. Eh, I am going to have to take his word for it but let's just say he gave me 8 inches of inspiration.

Everyone talks about how they mature over the years professionally, personally, etc, but I think we rarely stop and think about how we mature and evolve sexually. Believe it or not I didn't lose my virginity until I was 19. For the two years that followed I was completely abstinent, partly due to choice and partly due to circumstance (the men in Milwaukee are FUGLY!). I was still quite timid and shy when I moved to Chicago. It was several months before I had my first hook up. Shortly after that i was swept away by a sea of hot and sexy men (well, there were a few occasional trolls that snuck in, but I like to look back on them as a bit of charity work). Despite my new found sexual liberation I also suddenly became so concerned about what other people thought of me. As I got older though i realized the ones who are so quick to point a finger and judge are either A) bigger sluts than me, B) repressed jealous sluts, C) sluts on the down low, or D) pissed off sluts cuz I didn't want to have sex with them. once making that revelation I think I reached yet another level of sexual liberation. Suddenly I no longer felt shy disclosing every detail about my sexual escapades with my friends. The liberation manifested itself in different ways I think too. I suddenly became less shy about being seen nude (or practically naked) whether it be with strangers at the gym or changing clothes in front of friends.

So here I am, the Chicago gay version of Samantha. Well, I suppose that's better than being known as the Chicago gay Dorothy Zbornak!


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